Today was one of those days. I had a Lyme flare up while at the clinic. My head wouldn't keep still. My muscles twitched all over. My body spasm-ed in various places. Along with these silly symptoms comes an icky feeling, so terrible, I don't even know how to describe it. Icky. That's it.
I had the hydrogen peroxide and Vit. C. bags today. I was also treated for some of my head pressure issues. My body wigged out and it was a rough day to say the least.
My aunt (Tante Giesela) and her husband (Manfred) are visiting from Germany. So my father and these two were going to take me to my appt. just for fun today. Although I appreciate their kind gesture in planning a "fun" trip around my appt. (can Idaho really be considered "fun"?) I'm so very glad that didn't work out ...
In the book, The Secret Journey, one of the shipmates in the story said, "Some good comes with every difficulty." I wholeheartedly agree with this. One good thing that has come out of today (and many times before, really) is that my affection and admiration for John has grown.
He was right there by my side as my body shook uncontrollably. He stayed with me as I gave way to a fountain of tears as the doctor and his assistant worked on me. He held my hand and stroked my hair to help calm my trembling and breathing.
Words cannot express how grateful I am to have him be such a solid foundation that I can lean upon during my weakest moments.
Right now John is doing everything for our family. He's working 10-14 hours a day trying to launch our business by our goal date. He cleans up the house. He plays with the kids. He takes care of dinner. He drives 6 hours in one day, each week, to take me to and from my appointments. He prays for me. He gives me blessings. He sits or lays with me during any flare ups.
And he never. ever. complains.
I couldn't ask for a better best friend.
I've also felt closer to my family. My sister, Cora, was so good as to give up a day of her own to watch my kids from 8:30am to 4:00pm. It was so nice of her and I'm so grateful that she was willing to do such a thing and help the kids have such a great time.
.... Tired of being huddled away in my home, I tried to get out so I went to a church function. I lasted five minutes. That wasn't the greatest of ideas. But at least I tried. It just seems that people with chronic conditions tend to stay that way if they aren't trying to get out, do things and be around others. So, I'll keep trying.
It's kinda funny to look at the last three photo's that were taken at the clinic. Each time I've been there the picture gets worse. The first one I look pretty good. I wasn't feeling great but I wasn't feeling miserable either. The second one I'm feeling pretty yucky. The third well ... it speaks for itself. What will it be like next time??? I'm not worried though - I know I'm in the right hands.
Things may be tough right now but I know the treatments are simply stirring things up in not so pleasant ways as they kill the bacteria. The fight will be worth it.
And I will win!
Hm. Some people run marathons, triathlons, or iron man races. Although I'd love to be well enough to do such things, I'm simply anxious to win my race against Lyme!
Winning. That's what this is all about.
I can't wait to be me again.
Me!
No comments:
Post a Comment